#Adulting… What’s that all about?
I see on social media all the hashtags about #adulting and #successfuladulting and it just got me thinking… I usually see these posts when someone’s got a promotion, new home, become a parent or even when they’ve just been out on a healthy food shop, or when they’ve taken out the bin! But what really makes us adults or successful adults?
Firstly, we all grow up in different ways and at different stages so when do we really become adults? Here’s what I think, I think it depends. At the moment, for me, it depends on how i’m feeling on any given day. I’m 23 and I would probably class myself as an adult now, but like… a young adult? I have days where I get up, go into work and come home to a clean, tidy flat, I make myself dinner and have an early night and feel like I’m winning at this whole adulting game, at least on a basic level. But most days I go to bed a little too late, the flat’s not particularly tidy and could probably do with a clean and I’ve had a pot noodle for dinner because I just can’t be bothered to cook. And both of these sides of me are OK I guess, but is one just a little bit too much on the immature side, illustrating that I need to grow the f**k up? Who knows, but I do at least feel more adult when I’ve got a clean tidy flat, when my life is generally more organised and I’ve got myself into a good schedule (again on a basic level), but this only happens like 30% of the time and generally I just don’t have all my sh*t together – at least not as much as I’d like to. So, does that mean I’m not adult enough or that I’m not successfully adulting?
I often wonder what a real adult is, and if one of them were to look at me what the hell would they think? I love that social media has provided us with the concept of “I don’t want to adult today”. It’s great, isn’t it? I feel like this is used by the younger generation, not quite “the youth of today” but not those who are seasoned inhabitants of the real world either. Those of us who have all of the #feels of #dontwanttoadulttoday, we’re the ones who are at the beginnings of adulthood. We’re at a crossroads guys! We’re the ones who post things about building pillow forts and colouring-in because everything else is all just too god-damn much right now. We’re the ones who feel great about ourselves when we’ve done a healthy food shop (#winning!) But we’re also the ones who are still figuring it out, you know? We’re in-between.
For years in my youth (basically when I was a teen), I had a plan of what I wanted to do with my life, what I wanted to become and exactly how I would get there but my reality just didn’t work out how I thought it would. I’m at the stage now where I’m not doing too bad for myself but I could probably be doing better. I constantly question whether I’m at the right stage in life for my age; whether I should have a career right now or whether just having a good job is OK? Should I have more of a plan and know exactly where i’m going and what’s coming next? I feel like i’m forever being lectured about setting myself up for the future in various different ways and sometimes I feel like screaming “Just leave me be and I’ll get there in my own time and in my own way, OK?!”
So here’s the thing. I feel like it’s drummed into us from such a young age that we need to decide what we want to be when we grow up but in reality it’s not that bloody simple.I genuinely think we need to stop being so hard on ourselves when it comes #adulting. (We should stop being so hard on ourselves in general, really!) It’s such a cliché but we really are all different, we grow at different stages and progress at different times. What works for one of us won’t work for the other. So if you’re reading this and you’re crossing the threshold into adulthood, take your time, there’s no rush (no matter what anyone says.) Who the hell made up the rules of what constitutes being an adult and when you should become one anyway? Seriously? I don’t know if I want to see the bloody guidelines or tell them where to shove them! It’s great to have a plan for your life and to have something to work towards but if you’re at this crossroads and you’re still figuring things out that’s OK too!
To all the undecided out there, to those of us who aren’t quite there yet…Guys, we can do this – I mean, let’s be real we don’t have any choice, we have to – but we will get there. In our own time, in our own way. We have time to figure out what we want, let’s take it.
Summation? In the words of Jess Glynne, “Don’t be so hard on yourself, no!” And remember, no matter how old you are sometimes exactly what you need is a pillow fort and a colouring book. #Whenyourerightyoureright.
Happy adulting guys, and good luck!
Just by Mia.